Last night we had a big debate at the dinner table. Michael and I are off to the Hamptons today for an exciting event tomorrow morning - Southampton Sweat (it's going to be great so come by if you can!), and our 3 kids are staying with their grandparents.
Eli who is 8 decided that he wanted to sleep in the bed that Jonah (age 10) usually sleeps in. This coveted bed is in an area of the house that is more private and has the feeling of more independence. Jonah wasn't giving up that spot so easily, and was putting up a good fight to maintain the status quo with the sleeping arrangements. Jonah is super strong minded and the debate / argument was lasting too long with no movement whatsoever - so Michael said that if they could resolve the conflict within 90 seconds they could have dessert. Otherwise, no dessert. (We usually don't use sugar as bribery, but...we did!)
Eli pondered and very quickly said "he can have it", with true ambivalence in his voice. Jonah got what he wanted, and he immediately started SOBBING. He felt badly for not having been more flexible, generous and easygoing about the situation. Eli lost what he thought he wanted, but peacefully enjoyed his bowl of ice cream. Jonah had to carry that feeling for the rest of the evening, even while he ate his ice cream. I was proud of them both.
What's the moral of the story? When you are struggling, consider the power of letting go, completely, vs holding on. And then go have some (vegan)ice cream.
Enjoy this exquisite weekend and let us know if you need some Namaste. Our yoga, bodywork, personal training and other services, really support that "letting go" reflex.